Last week I was forwarded a series of articles from DiversityInc on a list of things not to say to number of minority groups, including Latinos, African Americans, women, etc. I read through the articles and found that many of the things that you shouldn't say to any of the groups were not really offensive. For the most part they may have shown a lack education, understanding or just plain thoughtless. There is no need to get offended or assume that the person who made the statement or raised the question is bad intentioned, racist, prejudiced or evil. We should simply acknowledge that we have done the exact same, if not worse.
Here is the list of statements which we are told not say to Latinos. I have put my take on them. To get perspective from DiversityInc on this or the other groups, you can visit their website at
www.diversityinc.com.
1. "Don't worry, you'll get the promotion, you're Latino/a."
This is my issue with Affirmative Action. If you are in a university setting, for example, and you got in due to connections your family has, no one will know (especially, if you are white). But if it is understood that the university has an affirmation action program and you are Hispanic or African American, it may be assumed that you got in as a result of this program and not your own merit. As people of color we cannot escape that reality. For that reason, I believe that we should hire, promote, fire, discipline, etc. based on the individual’s merits and not with any other consideration in terms of their ethnicity. For minorities, we should seek to rid ourselves of any perception that we received something not due to our merits but simply because of our minority status. There may have been a time for Affirmative Action, but today it is no longer needed.
2. "When did you arrive in this country?"
This is not a horrible question. Answer it and then ask the person when they themselves got here. It becomes pretty obvious to them what a silly question that was. I have asked this question of a number of cab drivers and none of them took offense. In fact, they did just as I suggest. It leads to a good conversation about our backgrounds.
3. "Hola! Habla Ingles?"
I agree with DiversityInc's answer.. Just speak English. If they don’t understand you, it will be come obvious.
4. "Do you live with your parents?"
I would guess this is a very rare question? More than likely it is asked of younger people. It could be easily asked of any young person, regardless of their race or ethnicity. The fact that this is taken as an ‘offense’ just talks to how easy it is for many minorities to take anything said to be with bad intent.
5. "You're not like them."
I wouldn’t take offense to this until I understood what they meant by it. For example, if I am not a Democrat, pro illegal immigration and in favor of bi-lingual education, they may be right, I may not be like a majority of Hispanics. If anything this may speak to the expectations set by the appearance of the monolithic Latino perspective at times. If we had a greater diversity of thought and opinion across the broad spectrum of social and political issues, perhaps we would be more difficult to pigeonhole. I was reading an article in Hispanic magazine and the question was why the Latino vote had dropped off the radar screen. There are two reasons I can think of: (1) we don't vote so regardless of our numbers we can be taken for granted, and (2) we are a one issue voting bloc (immigration). When we actually vote and have a broader perspective beyond immigration, perhaps politicians will take us more seriously.
6. "Can you show me your knife?"
The fact that a one time incident from 20 years ago even made this list goes to show that we’re reaching to find things that could possibly offend Latinos.
7. "Why don't all you Latinos stop doing that?"
It’s the flip side of the same coin when minorities lump whites into the same category and assume that they have a monolithic worldview.
8. "You're not white."
I’ll bet that if you ask Latino’s if they categorize themselves as Caucasian, 9 out of 10 would say no. This has to more do with understanding the federal racial/ethnic categories, not a slight against Hispanics.
9. Butchering a Latino's last name.
I find it interesting that Hispanics expect other Americans to pronounce their names correctly, especially if they have names that are very traditional or are difficult to pronounce in English. I am not sure why Greeks, Russians, Germans, etc. have been able to traverse this issue without it becoming a real problem. In addition, when Hispanics who do not speak English fluently do not pronounce English names correctly, should these individuals whose names 'have been butchered' take personal offense? We have a country of great diversity of languages, if you prefer to use the proper pronunciation and accent from the country of origin, you should expect that many will not understand you or will have trouble pronouncing it.
10. "Do you speak Spanish?"
This is simply being curious if you speak another language. There is no ‘code’ to determine how ‘hispanic’ someone is. This is now bordering on paranoia when you think other Latinos are assessing your "Latinoness" based on your ability to speak the language. Spanish is a beautiful language. I don't get to use it every day, sometimes I simply look forward to having a conversation in Spanish. Anytime someone asks me this, this is how I take it. I have asked this question myself for this reason.
God Bless.